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2006 Permanency Advocates

At the AFFM 2006 Spring Conference, "Passionate For Permanency, A Family For Every Child," eight couples were honored for their outstanding work as advocates for permanency. One couple from each district received a 2006 Permanency Advocate Award. Each of these couples have shared and role modeled for the birth parents of the
children in their homes, not always an easy thing to do. They have always kept the children's safety first, without losing sight of the importance of the connection with the birth families. They have also worked hard towards meeting the needs of the children, while patiently and lovingly helping the children flourish.

District 1
Carla White & Stephen Ryan
of Kennebunk

District 2
Karen Bolduc & Alexandra Jackson
(K & Alex) of Raymond

District 3
Michelle & Dan Thibeault
of Durham

District 4
Mary & Kevin McLaughlin
of Belgrade

District 5
Debbie Simmons & Larry Moran
of Rockland

District 6
Kathleen & Duane Fox
of Bangor

District 7
Ernestine & Ed Atwood
of Cutler

District 8
Joyce & Phil Gagnon
of Van Buren

Congratulations to all of the award winners and to all those who care for Maine's Children. Your work and caring is appreciated.

Thank You!!

AFFM extends a warm thank you to all of the volunteers that worked to make the 2006 Spring Conference a success! We would also like to thank all of the individuals and businesses that donated prizes and give-a-ways! Watch for a list in the June newsletter of all the businesses and individuals who contributed to the Conference.

Desperately Missed…

I am looking for a Child of Mine by Carters stuffed LAMB. It has a jersey body with a light print on it. It is about 8" with fuzzy legs with peach ends on them. Its head has velour like material on the face that is a light peach material, with bright blue stitched eyes.

It was made exclusively for Wal-mart in 2003 by Prestige Toys. The manufacturer says it is no longer made. The body has a sound box in it. I think it used to make a twinkle sound.

HELP! my son has worn out his two. He really loves his "Baby". I wouldn't care if it is used, or if the music box doesn't work, as ours doesn't, because of numerous washings. Thanks!! -Barbara Ford

If anyone has one of these LAMBs and would like to help Barbara , please call 223-4472.

Kid's Place

A Memorial to Mikey With Love from his brother Joey (age 12)

I sort of thought my Mom would write a story or poem to my brother's memory, but instead she thought I should write something myself.

When Mom first told me that Mikey had died I thought I would just cry forever. Then for a few nights I could not go to sleep. I actually worried that I would die if I did. When I did sleep I had nightmares. I want to be with Mikey and other people like my Dad and my nephews that have already died, but I am actually afraid I would miss everyone else that I know and love. (I know when it is my time to die I will be ready but I am not ready now.) A few days later I wanted to just go to sleep and sleep until I was not sad anymore. Then a few days later I was just screaming and mad at everyone for no reason. I think I am a little better now. I like the idea my Mom came up with. She suggested I write an article to be in the newsletter where she works. The thing that is different about my brother and me is that we were both adopted but not by the same families. Mikey and I were lucky because our parents knew that it was important for us to know each other and to be brothers and friends. We did not see each other as much as we would have liked, like every day, but we knew where each other was and our parents did get us together. The Moms kept in touch and would tell each of us what was going on with the other. It was sort of funny, cause Mikey and I seemed to get sick a lot and when we did, well we usually had stuff at the same time even though we lived in different towns in different families! I guess that is part of why I worried about going to sleep right after Mikey died cause I worried that it might be like that again. It wasn't and I know better now.

Anyway, what I really want to say is for adoptive, foster and kinship parents to think about what it is like for kids not to be able to know their own brothers and sisters. Can you imagine what it would be like for you if you had to not know your birth parents and not even get to see or live with your brother or sister? I love my adopted brothers and sisters and I love my Mom but I wish I knew all of my family. I was lucky enough to know Mikey for as long as he was on Earth. I know we looked almost identical even though he was younger then me. I know we had the same voice cause our mother's couldn't tell which one was speaking if they were not looking at us! We wore the same type of eye glasses for a while. We loved to play video games. We liked to play swords and with toy weapons (Both our mother's hated them!) He loved his dog and I love mine.

One time we were both at Dr. Lever's at the same time. I was waiting to be seen and Mike was already in the doctor's examining room. Mike was there with his Dad and I was there with my mother. I was playing and this lady said ,"Hey I thought you had your glasses on. I looked up and said "Oh I put them on the chair cause they kept slipping." She looked at me and said" Oh my, I thought you were Mike." We then figured out that she was Mike's grandmother and she told me she was and that she knew me when I was a baby. You can see from that just how much we looked alike as his grandmother actually lived with him at that time!

Just think about all that I know about my brother and all I would not have known if my family and his thought we should only be the kid of theirs? I hope you as parents will think about what I have told you and try to be thinking it is a good idea for your kids to know their brothers and sisters too. What you learn from me writing this and if you do let your kids know their brothers and sisters is my gift to Mikey's memory and even though he is not here on Earth he will still be doing good for others just like he did when he was alive. If you do this you will be giving a gift to Mike too and for your kids too.

Mike was a very nice brother and I miss him. I am sad for his Mom and Dad and his brother and sister and his dog and cats. They all loved him so much and miss him badly too.

Please when you read this think about making a plan for your kids to see their biological brothers and sisters. It will make you all happier and if anything should ever happen you will all have good things to remember.

Article written by Bryanna April 2006
Maine Foster Care

I love being in foster care! Without it I would not be as healthy as I am now. I think that foster care is important because sometimes in life, things don't work out exactly how people plan and sometimes when that plan messes up, group homes, foster families and the state are there to recognize it. Being in foster care does NOT mean your family gave up on you or does not care. It means that your family is maybe having some trouble in life or can't be by your side because of certain reasons. Some kids or adults think that kids in foster care have a messed up life and do not want to be around them or just think they are weird and different. But really, people in foster care are just like everyone else. Some kids in foster care have some problems in life and may have a few challenges but everybody has a few challenges in their life. Being a foster kid in my perspective is awesome!

My name is Bryanna and I am eleven years old. I am on the honor roll in middle school and I love to dance and listen to music. I wrote this because I want people to be aware of foster children on National Foster Care month and not put them aside. I want them to just maybe consider doing a good deed for kids having a rough life.

Come Join the Family Fun

"Foster Family Day at the Fort,
Bridging the Gap to a More Secure Future"

The family fun day and picnic will be held Saturday, May 20th 11AM - 4PM
At Fort Knox State Park and Historic Site Rte. 174, Prospect, ME

Foster, Adoptive & Kinship Families and all those who wish to celebrate Foster Care Month are invited to attend.

Television star and former Maine youth in care, Victoria Rowell will be at the Fort as well as other guest speakers and entertainers.

There will be a complimentary picnic for all.

The Honorable First Lady, Karen Baldacci, is donating a book to each child that attends.

Come spend the day, tour the Fort, have a wonderful time with your children and enjoy the games, prizes food and refreshments.

There will be a Kite Flying group visiting the Fort that day, which should be an entertaining sight for all.

Dillon is an amazing twelve year old boy. He just recently was placed in a therapeutic foster home and is no longer in a group home.  He will do well with siblings or as an only child.  Dillon likes to play sports, and is currently playing baseball.  This past fall he played football, which was wonderful for him. It was a positive outlet for him and deflected a lot of his previous aggressive behaviors. Sports have also helped Dillon build his self esteem, and he plans to continue playing.  Dillon has siblings that he should continue contact with.  He does well with both older and younger children. Dillon likes to have older siblings around and to look up to them. And, at the same time, when with younger kids, he is a good role model and encourages them to do well.  Dillon utilizes special education services at school and is doing very well with one on one support.  He is a great kid, and he's looking for a permanent family. Adoption subsidy may be available to the most appropriate family.

Interested families should contact Erin Dennis, 35 Anthony Ave., Augusta, ME 04333, or call (207) 624-8088 or 800-452-1926 (in state).

Great Books to Read in Foster Care Month!

• I Miss My Foster Parents by Stefon Herbert

• Maybe Days: A Book for Children in Foster Care by Jennifer Wilgocki & Marcia Kahn Wright

• Zachary's New Home: A Story for Foster and Adopted Children by Geraldine Bloomquist

• My Foster Care Journey by Beth O'Malley

• Small Feats: Unsung Accomplishments and Everyday Heroics of Foster and Adoptive
  Parents by Richard J. Delaney Ph.D.

• A Child Called It by David Peltzor

• The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson

• 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12 by Thomas W. Phelan Ph.D.

• Building the Bonds of Attachment: Awakening Love in Deeply Troubled Children by Daniel Hughes

Join AFFM at the Hall of Flags

May is Foster Care Month!

Join AFFM as we begin the month of special events on May 1st at the Hall of Flags in Augusta. This event will be from 9:00-11:30 AM and will include the reading of Governor Baldacci's Proclamation of May as Foster Care Month, as well as honored guest speakers, light refreshments, and entertainment - all to celebrate you!! Call AFFM at 1-800-833-9786 to sign up!

Directions: Go on I-95 and take exit 109A if coming from the north, and 109 if coming from the south. This takes you on to 202. You want to be headed east on 202 until you get to Armory Street, across the street from the Augusta Armory. Take a right on to Armory Street, which turns into Capitol Street. Follow Capitol Street for .6 miles and turn right on to Jackson Ave, and then a quick left onto State House Drive. End at 2 State House Station.

New Support Offered for the Educational Needs of Adopted Children

This legislative session, LD 1755 was a bill signed by the Governor to allow children who are in foster care, adopted from foster care, or in Permanency Guardianship to be eligible to apply for a tuition waiver from the University of Maine system, the Community Colleges, or Maine Maritime. In the past, adopted children were not eligible to apply for this waiver. There are 30 slots per year, and, while this number did not increase, the State of Maine believes that they will be able to "triage" the need between adopted children, foster children, and permanency guardianship children, and that the number of children eligible per year will be manageable. These are a first come, first serve basis and are competitive slots. Applications are accepted through the Finance Authority of Maine (FAME) and can be accessed through their
website: www.famemaine.com. If you have questions, you can contact either:

Adoption Program Manager
Virginia S. Marriner
Office of Child & Family Services
Department of Health & Human Services
221 State Street
Augusta, ME 04333
207-287-5060

Independent Living Specialist
Hugh Sipowicz
Office of Child & Family Services
Department of Health & Human Services
221 State Street
Augusta, ME 04333
207-287-5060

A Day with Dr. Ross Greene

The Maine Regional Children's Cabinets and The Northeast Case Resolution Committee (Penobscot) are sponsoring a free training for educators and community providers. Dr. Ross Greene is the well-known author of the book The Explosive Child. In this workshop Dr. Greene will provide an overview of a model of treatment called Collaborative Problem Solving (CPS). The target audience for this workshop is SAT team members, School Administrators, Special Educators, Guidance, School Case Managers, School Reintegration Team members, community providers such as Targeted Case Managers, Therapists, etc. This workshop will be held Thursday, May 25, at the Spectacular Events Center, 395 Griffin Rd., in Bangor, from 8:30 AM - 3:30 PM. If you are interested in attending, please fax Lorna at Wings for Children and Families at 941-2989 with your name, school district (if applicable), contact telephone number, fax number, and email address. If you have any questions about the event, please call Trish at 941-2988.

Allegation Prevention and Protocol Trainings

Bette Hoxie and Jane Drake will be presenting three upcoming Allegation Prevention and Protocol trainings. They will be May 23 at the Rec. Center in Caribou, June 6 at DHHS in Portland, and June 20 at DHHS in Bangor. Each of these trainings is from 10:00 AM to 12:30 PM. Call the AFFM office at 1-800-833-9786 to register.