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Volume 7, No. 10 / 11 |
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Return to Newsletter Archive |
ANGELS IN ADOPTION
Maine DHHS is very pleased
to announce that three Maine residents have
received the Angels in Adoption Award presented
by the Congressional Coalition on Adoption
(CCA). CCA was created in 1985 as a bicameral,
bipartisan alliance of Members of Congress
dedicated to improving adoption policy and
practice, and to focus public attention
on the needs of orphans and foster children
as well as the advantages of adoption. Since
it's inception, the CCA has grown
to over 180 Members of Congress.
This organization is dedicated
to raising awareness about tens of thousands
of foster children in this country and the
millions of orphans around the world in
need of permanent, safe, and loving homes;
and to eliminating the barriers that hinder
these children from realizing their basic
need of a family.
"The Angels in Adoption
Program, is CCA's signature public
awareness program which provides an opportunity
to all members of the U.S. Congress to honor
the good work of their constituents who
have enriched the lives of foster children
and orphans. Angels is an event geared to
highlight ordinary people doing extraordinary
things. These "unsung heros"
are selected by members of Congress and
invited to attend a Washington-based awards
ceremony and an evening gala given in their
honor. In addition to these "unsung
heroes" chosen from all 50 states,
"National Angels" are recognized
for their adoption and foster care advocacy
on a national scale. Former National Angels
include notables such as Muhammad Ali, Dave
Thomas, Steven Curtis Chapman, and Bruce
Willis. Each year, more than 150 members
of Congress participate making it the year's
single most significant congressional event
pertaining to child welfare in the nation."
This year, 2004, Maine is
very privileged to have three recipients
of the Angels in Adoption award who were
honored on September 23, 2004 in Washington,
DC.
The Maine DHHS, Bureau of
Child and Family Services, wishes to acknowledge
this significant achievement, thank Senator
Snowe and Collins, and continue to applaud
all the families that come forward to provide
a safe, stable and lasting home for children
in need.[
~Virginia S. Marriner~
Adoption Program Manager
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The following is the excerpt from
the 2004 Congressional Awards Celebration
Brochure:
Bette Hoxie
Senator Olympia J. Snowe
Bette Hoxie, of Old Town,
Maine is a genuine Angel in Adoption.
For 32 years, she has provided love,
guidance and commitment to the welfare
of foster children in her care, as well
as those in homes across the state of
Maine. She has adopted eight of the
children she fostered. Bette is also
Liason Director of Adoptive and Foster
Families of Maine (AFFM). AFFM is the
primary resource for adoptive and foster
families in Maine: providing information
and connections to service providers
and training. She is respected by Maine
government officials and known as the
"person to call" for information
and support in matters affecting the
state's adopted and foster
children. Bette has been instrumental
in bringing the practice of Kinship
Care to Maine. Many agency boards seek
her membership. For her commitment to
children, Bette has been recognized
by her local community with awards and
honors. KidsPeace, a national children's
charity that serves children in Maine,
recently awarded her their "Unsung
Hero Award" for her quiet and
selfless efforts to improve the lives
of Maine's children. Bette Hoxie
is exactly the type of person Angels
in Adoption celebrates.
Shawn and Rita Yardley
Senator Susan M. Collins
Shawn and Rita Yardley's
commitment to their family and community
is truly remarkable. At a time when
most families are thinking about what
they will do with their free time after
their children have left home, the Yardley's
decided to adopt three children who
had been in the foster care system.
In January, they graciously welcomed
Kiana (8), Kira (6), and Tessa (5) into
their home, which already includes their
four biological children. While raising
seven children, Shawn and Rita have
devoted their professional careers to
helping others in the community. Shawn
is the director of the River Coalition,
where he is responsible for developing
prevention programs for children in
foster care through collaborative efforts
with schools, social service agencies,
local, state and federal governments
and the University of Maine. He has
over seventeen years of child welfare
management experience within the Maine
Department of Human Services, and as
a faculty associate in the social work
department at the University of Maine.
Rita dedicates her time to providing
service in the classroom. She has worked
for eight years as an educator for special
needs students in Bangor School Department.
Shawn and Rita are also heavily involved
in community-based work. Shawn serves
on the boards of numerous organizations
throughout the state, including the
Adoptive and Foster Families of through
collaborative efforts with schools,
social service agencies, local, state
and federal governments and the University
of Maine. He has over seventeen years
of child welfare management experience
within the Maine Department of Health
and Human Services, and as a faculty
associate in the social work department
at the University of Maine. Rita dedicates
her time to providing service in the
classroom. She has worked for eight
years as an educator for special needs
students in Bangor School Department.
Shawn and Rita are also heavily involved
in community-based work. Shawn serves
on the boards of numerous organizations
throughout the state, including the
Adoptive and Foster Families of Maine,
Catholic Charities of Maine, Maine Mentoring
Partnership, United Way of Eastern Maine
and Communities for Children Advisory
Council. Rita has served as the facilitator
for the youth ministry program at St.
Mary's Parish in Bangor for the
past 10 years. I believe that Shawn
and Rita truly exemplify the spirit
of this award through the selflessness
with which they share their time and
energy with family, friends, and their
community. It gives me great pleasure
to provide such well-deserved recognition
to this exceptional couple.
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A Probate Judge's
Perspective
I was privileged to interview
the honorable Judge Mailloux. Our amiable
conversation contained an educational component
as well as a touching declaration of pride
for his children and grandchildren. The
interview consisted of the following questions
and responses:
How many adoptions have you
finalized this year ?
Judge Mailloux shared the
following statistics:
Finalized Adoptions January–
Present
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Step-parent Adoptions |
8 |
Foster Parent Adoptions |
4 |
Agency Adoptions |
0 |
Adult Adoptions |
1 |
Kinship Adoptions |
1 |
Total for the Year |
19 |
If you could change one thing about the
adoption process what would it be?
"I would say that
question is two sided. I would like to see
the procedure become a quicker and easier
process. However not so quick and easy that
the Iimportance and meaning is overlooked.
I would also like to see the pre-filing
process streamlined but not to the point
that you lose the protective elements."
Is there one particular
event in an adoption experience that has
stayed in your mind as symbolic of something
you would like to see in other adoption
proceedings?
"To me every adoption
is special. Serious emotional reactions
by the family make you know as the judge,
that I made the right decision for that
family. Two other things come to mind. A
five or six-year-old girl whose mother did
ceramics gave me a ceramic gift that still
sits on the bench. I also remember one particular
adoption where the adopted child had 6 or
7 siblings. They all came back for a picture.
The siblings were beaming as they smiled
for the camera. Watching them confirmed
the creation of a family, not just a change
in legal status."
What do you see
as the key ingredient in a successful adoption?
"Well I believe
that the key ingredient is love. Love the
child. Make them feel loved and excepted.
Make them feel part of the family."
Can you think of
ways that AFFM as an association, might
enhance or make the experience in court
easier for families?
"Prepare them for
the potentially embarrassing aspects of
the proceedings. There may be questions
regarding a financial abnormality. I usually
discuss past criminal concerns with the
prospective parents prior to the court hearing
and I may decide to have a separate hearing
for financial concerns as well. I do not
want to preclude the adoption, it should
be a time of celebration."
What is your role
as President of the Probate Judge Assembly
?
"Setting up and
conducting four meetings annually. The meetings
consist of an educational piece. Topics
include arriving at uniform solutions. We
are trying to implement procedural uniformity."
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We
Are Grands!
Grands come in all shapes, sizes, and colors
Some are men some women We come from all walks
of life Some are married some single and some
are in-between.
Some are young and some not so young
Some have money to burn and some must burn
the budget. Some Grands stay home and others
hold down more than one job to provide for
the children in their care.
Some gave birth to many children some only
one, some have never given birth but care
for the children of their spouses, brothers,
sisters, and even the children of strangers.
The one thing we have in common is the love
we have for our families, the knowledge that
we must do what is right no matter the personal
costs and the determination to carry on where
the bio parents of our children have failed.
We pick up the pieces of shattered families
and try to heal the pain that we may not have
caused but cannot ignore.
You'll see Grands at schools, doctor's offices,
in the supermarket or the park.
We may be laughing, crying, working or
playing. We not only try to make things better
for our own children but for children everywhere.
We are GRANDS! We Are PROUD!
Visit www.grandsplace.com for comfort and support from other kinship
caregivers. |
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Meet More of
District 3
John Miller is the Assistant
Program Administrator for District 3.
John has worked for the Bureau for 25
years as a Child Protective Caseworker,
Supervisor, and Assistant Program Administrator.
John and his wife, Marsha (who is a Supervisor
for the Bureau of Family Independence)
have two sons. John also has two new Mini
Schnauzer puppies as part of his family.
John and his wife enjoy skiing and boating.
John spent several years supervising the
Foster Home Licensing Unit and he remains
committed to the support and retention
of foster parents. John fully appreciates
the collaboration and teamwork necessary
to achieve successful outcomes in public
child welfare. John points out that the
Tri-County Foster/Adoptive Parent Association
has a long rich history of effectively
collaborating with Bureau staff toward
the best outcomes for the children and
families. This past May , District 3 Staff
came together with Association members
for the 25th Annual Foster/Adoptive Parent
Appreciation Dinner.
Thom Hoffman is the Supervisor
of District 3's Licensing and Support
Unit. This unit is comprised of two Community
Care Workers, a Placement Specialist,
a Kinship Care Specialist, two After Hours
Caseworkers, and three Case Aides. Thom
has 26 years of experience with the Bureau
as a Caseworker and Supervisor. Thom is
also very committed to the support and
retention of foster parents. He recognizes
how important communication is to the
working relationship between foster parents
and the Bureau staff. Thom writes a monthly
insert to the Tri-County Foster/Adoptive
Parent Association Newsletter.
Thom enjoys spending his
free time on his sailboat with his partner,
Louise.
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Election Day November 2, 2004
We encourage all citizens to vote according
to their own beliefs on November 2nd, 2004.
Voting is a cherished American opportunity,
exercise your right!
As you prepare to vote, consider whether
or not your candidate of choice is invested
in policies that help children, youth and
families. Research the candidate's plans
for America's children. Please visit www.everychildmatters.org to learn more about actions you can take...
Because in Maine every child matters !
Call AFFM at 827-2331 or toll free at 800-833-9786
to receive your free bumper sticker! Limited
quantity! |
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Foster Care
Smoking Rule
Just a reminder that the foster care smoking
rule went into effect on October 9th, 2004.
AFFM has joined with the Maine Department
of Health and Human Services and a Partnership
for a Tobacco-Free Maine in helping smokers
to quit. |
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National Adoption
Awareness Month
November is National Adoption
Awareness Month, a time for families and
communities to come together to celebrate,
educate and advocate for
the purpose of increasing public awareness
about adoption.
Look for the enclosed calendar
for ways to celebrate!
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Infant & Toddler Sign Language
Day Workshops
Workshops are geared
to parents and parents to be, caregivers
and educators of HEARING infants,
toddlers and preverbal children.
Workshop locations throughout Maine
and New England.
For more information
on dates and locations contact Hilltop
Works Wellness Center by phone at
207-542-1402 or by email at thehilltopworks@yahoo.com
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October is National Fire
Prevention Month
~Fire Safety Tips~
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¨ Develop a home fire escape
plan and practice it often.
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Install at least one smoke detector
on every level of your home.
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Check your smoke detector monthly.
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Make your street number visible
from the road to ensure that responding
emergency personnel can find your
home.
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Be fully prepared for a real fire:
when a smoke alarm sounds get out
immediately.
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Once you are out of the building,
stay out! Under no circumstances
should you ever go back into a burning
building. If someone is missing,
inform the fire department. Firefighters
have the equipment and the skills
to perform rescues.
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Up Coming Events
for Kinship Providers
Bangor Area Kinship Holiday Party–
Sunday, November 28th from 1:00 to 4:00 p.m.
at the Ramada Inn on the Oldin Road in Bangor.
For more information please contact Adoptive
and Foster Families of Maine (AFFM) at 827-2331
or toll free at 800-833-9786.
Southern Maine Kinship Holiday Party–
Sunday, December 5th from 11:00 to 4:00 p.m.
at the Greater Portland YMCA on Forest Avenue.
For more information please contact FACT at
941-2347 or toll free at 866-298-0896.
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Donated Clothing
Family Connections has an over-abundance
of donated clothing for kinship families.
The clothing is in very good condition and
is available in the following sizes:
If you are a kinship provider in need of
any of these items please call our office.
We would be happy to make a time for you to
come in or give us your address and we will
send a box of clothing. Contact Jan Bisbee
at 1-866-298-0896.
Families and Children Together 304 Hancock
Street, Bangor, ME 04401
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If you're interested
in learning about more children in Maine
who are available for adoption, you can
visit the "Maine's Waiting Children"
web site at: http://www.adoptuskids.org/states/me/
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I'm Adopted!
I had a DREAM last night…
I had to choose a MOMMY and a DADDY…
At first I wondered what to do…
there were so many it seemed untrue…
Short, tall, thin…
and stout…
I couldn't decide which
ones to pick out.
But I was as surprised
as I could be…
My MOMMY and DADDY had already picked ME!!
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Adoption Announcement
Alan and Stephanie Damboise are pleased to
announce the adoption of their 27 month–old
son Stephen Alan Damboise.
The adoption was finalized on September 22,
2004. Stephen joins his adult siblings Nichole,
Janice and Tori. Stephen is also an uncle to
Damian, Kaine, Nickolas, William and Olivia!
Congratulations! |
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Volunteer
of the Month!
Chelsea Brady is currently a freshman
at Old Town High School. She has been generously
volunteering her time at AFFM for the past several
weeks after school. It has been a delight to
have Chelsea helping out. She is very creative
and entertains us all with her wonderfully upbeat
and vivacious personality. Thank you Chelsea
for your hard work and willingness to help accomplish
the many necessary tasks here at AFFM! |
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Pumpkin Valley Farm
Pumpkin Valley Farm in Dayton is offering
a discount to foster, adoptive, and kinship
families on Fridays throughout the month of
October. Pack a picnic and come enjoy the
beauty of Fall. Pumpkin Valley Farm offers
a corn maze, free hayrides, a play area and
of course a pumpkin patch. Explore the 6 acre
Cornfield Maze at $5 for adults and $3.50
for children. To receive your discount, mention
that you are an adoptive, foster, or kinship
family. Conquer the maze as a family and create
memories that will last a lifetime!
For more information and directions, visit www.PumpkinValleyFarm.com or call 929-4545
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AFFM Discount Card
AFFM recently added the businesses below to
the list of participating vendors.
If you are an adoptive, foster, or kinship
provider please call AFFM to receive an AFFM
discount card. 827-2331 or toll free at 800-833-9786
Yankee Lanes
276 Bath Road
Brunswick, ME 04011
Show your AFFM card, fill out a coupon, and
Yankee Lanes will give you one free game for
up to six (6) people in your party.
Mary Kay
Heidi Gallant
Independent Beauty Consultant
10% off any order
Free gift with $40.00 purchase
207-990-0725
207-852-5972
www.marykay.com//hgallant |
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L.L. Bean, Inc. DHHS Foster Parent Program Discount
Policy
L.L. Bean will no longer be participating
in the DHHS Foster Parent Program Discount
Policy
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Neighbors Make a Difference Day
Adoptive and Foster Families of Maine would
like to thank three individuals who certainly
made a difference in the office on September
14th, Neighbors Make a Difference Day! AFFM
sincerely thanks Katie Deane-Grant, Don Smith,
and Theresa Harvey (KeyBank Employees) for their
hard work shampooing rugs and washing the windows
until they gleamed. It was pleasure a having
you in the office. |
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FAMILY TIES the Newsletter of Adoptive &
Foster Families of Maine, Inc.
Published with support from
: the Maine Dept. of Human Services
Please direct comments to:
Editor, Family Ties
Adoptive & Foster Families of Maine
294 Center Street, Unit 1
Old Town, ME 04468.
Web form
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Ten Commandments of Child-Centered Adoption
by Jame L. Gritter, MSW
In the event that adoption is deemed necessary,
Thou Shalt Not:
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